Lessons From The Ever-Observant

"You see, you and I don't live in a series of big, dramatic moments. We all live in an endless series of little moments. The character of a life isn't set in ten big moments. The character of a life is set in the ten thousand little moments of everyday life." ~Tripp, Whiter Than Snow

They are always listening. They are always watching intently and observing your every move. They know what kind of clothes you wear, what you drive, what you like to eat. They watch how you walk, talk, and carry yourself. You are under a microscope and a stethoscope. It's just the reality of being a leader - particularly on board a ship. While your buddies in the business world are able to fake a facade and keep up appearances for the 8-10 hours a day they are in the office – it cannot be done in the confines of a piece of floating metal, with ever-observing Sailors densely packed onboard, in the middle of the ocean for 6+ months. It just can't be done. We work where we live. There is no escape of examination. Sailors are very perceptive and great judges of character. Every moment. They cannot be fooled for long, if at all. You will be found out and known for who you truly are. The sea has a way of revealing the true nature of a person. Underway, if you are awake you are at work. If you are not horizontal, in your rack, then you are being employed - standing watch, walking your spaces, at your computer, or in meetings. And, rather you sleep or you work you are being watched.

I know this to be true. There I was somewhere in the middle of the Western Pacific, returning from deployment, having just pulled out from a liberty port in Australia. I was a young Ensign, underway, as the JOOD (Junior Officer of the Deck), standing the mid-watch (2200-0200), on the bridge of a Destroyer. The Conning Officer and I were leaning on the window sill near the alidade (the normal place to spend time on the mid-watch) talking about our last port and thinking about the potential of the next. [At this point it should be mentioned that I was the lay leader onboard and responsible for conducting all Sunday Christian services and Wednesday Bible studies – so, the entire crew knew I was a believer]. As the bow cut through the moonlit shimmering waves we talked. And as the Bible says, where many words are sin is not far – the idle words turned to gossip and disdain for another person. The name of one of our fellow JO’s became the focus as we began talking trash about him. We were carrying on, in whispers, about how Ensign Jones would show up uninvited on the quarterdeck and annoyingly tag-along with the group of us wherever we went. The conversation continued to worsen (as such things tend to do) until I decided to meander out to the bridge wing to check the contact picture. On my way back in, as I’m stepping through the hatch, pausing to pull the handle shut behind me, I hear a sweet quiet voice come from the dark area near the helm. A young, Christian girl (who had once sought me with deep spiritual questions), Seaman Smith, was the helmsman and begins to ask me a most haunting question. Without malice, in her gentle southern draw, she says, “Excuse me, Sir.” I respond, “What is SN Smith.” She continued, “I was just wondering, Sir, what do you suppose Jesus would think?” Unaware, I asked “About what?” Her response still reverberates in my soul even as I write this . . . “About what you were saying of Mr. Jones.” Dumbfounded and ashamed I stood crushed under the conviction of those words. I still feel pain as a lump fills my throat and tears come to my eyes when I think back on that brief moment. I wish I would have responded in godly repentance, instead I was frozen and stunned by my sin. SN Smith was God’s mouthpiece that night. Certainly, the character of a life is set in ten thousand little moments of everyday life. Witness, which is to say Christian credibility, can parish like bio-luminescence off the ship’s bow. You are always being observed.

Prayer For COWPENS & CAPT Graf

A great leadership tragedy has gripped the interest and attention of the Navy in general and the Surface community specifically in recent days. There is an enormous amount of stir on naval forums, blogs, and the media over the current relief of the COWPENS' Commanding Officer, CAPT Holly Graf, due to "cruelty and mistreatment" of her Officers and crew. Since this blog is mostly dedicated to (Christian) naval leadership I would be remiss to not add my comments. Clearly, CAPT Graf's conduct, attested to by many who have served/known her, is incompatible with the type of leadership expected and normally practiced in the Surface Navy. I believe this is why the outcry within the community has been so extensive and passionate.

So, my thoughts have been on what should be our response? We would do well to recognize that this type of behavior is rooted in a broken heart. Sin (fear, selfish ambition, pride, control, etc.) drives leaders to abuse their position of authority and consequently those that they have been called to lead/serve. Secondly, we must recognize that each of us have within us the capacity for such actions as well. I know that I am capable of far worse things than those that I have read about occurring under CAPT Graf's command. Realize for the regenerate it is the grace of God that restrains the sin that stems "cruelty and mistreatment" of other people. We too are often cruel toward others and mistreat people as we pursue our own agenda and fight to fulfill our own desires (James 4:1-2). Have you ever acted out in anger? Have you spoken cruelly to another person? Have you belittled those you know? Have you ever struggled to maintain control in the midst of fear and ambition-induced stress? I certainly have (and I am a Christian, supposedly sensitive to the promptings of the Spirit and governed by the principles of the Bible!). OK, maybe not as consistently or publicly as CAPT Graf, but the same source of darkness entrenched in her is resident in you and me. Surely, "but for the grace of God go I" is an appropriate response. Don't you see - Holly Graf is you, Holly Graf is me. We all are deserving of being "fired." What if we were to receive what we deserved? What if we were treated according to our actions, the unseen acts committed when no one is watching, and the secret motives of our hearts? You know what I'm talking about - those things that cause you sleepless nights as you ponder them in the still quiet darkness - laying restlessly in bed in the middle of the night - that you have done, which you wish could be undone. We should be so very thankful that God's grace restrains the effects of the Fall and our sinful flesh. We are not treated according to who we are and what we do.

So, CAPT Graf should serve as a momentary mirror giving pause for self-reflection. Our response should be to recognize that she is not beyond the redemption afforded by the Gospel. God uses times of brokenness to humble people and call them to repent and turn to a real and personal relationship with Him. Surely, CAPT Graf's world has came crashing down around her. Formerly, her identity was found in her career - it has been shattered. May she look to the Lord and be re-created anew as her identity becomes rooted in her relationship with the only Thing that is real and lasting. Finally (or, even better, firstly), let us pray. Pray for Holly Graf. Pray for her to be driven to godly repentance. Pray that this event in her life be the sharp needle that penetrates her hardened heart making way for the silken thread of the Gospel to enter. Pray that this temporary tragedy results in THE relationship that provides the experience of eternal life. Also, Pray for CAPT Marin as he assumes command of COWPENS (remember God has appointed him to this position at such a time as this, Rom. 13:1). He has a great challenge ahead of him and will need divine strength, wisdom, compassion, and discernment as he leads the battered Sailors of the Mighty Moo. Pray for the crew of the ship as they recover; that there would remain no bitterness and their faith and respect for the position of "Commanding Officer" and the Wardroom would be re-established and re-affirmed. Pray for those Surface Warfare Officers and Sailors that read about CAPT Graf that they would reflect on their own leadership style; considering how they can improve their own care for those they sail with. Pray that the culture of the surface community would change. That we would become more transparent and honest in how we lead and by what criteria we evaluate those with the potential for further service as leaders in this great Navy. We have case studies to examine groundings, poor INSURVs, safety mishaps, and tactical mistakes in combat. Yet, rarely do we talk specifically about the multitude of firings and causes for reliefs by senior leaders that inundate the cover of Navy Times. The details are kept secret and the perpetrators never give an account. They are simply and quietly sneaked into a cubicle in the basement of the Pentagon or stashed on a staff until eased into retirement. The next generation of leaders need to know what went wrong, why these CO's were removed, and what specifically made their behavior unacceptable. This kind of conversation must occur if we are ever going to change - to improve for our Sailor's sake. It is my prayer that we will become more transparent and in discussing how to lead and where leaders have failed - emerge as a more healthy community - established in leadership attributes that reflect a heart of service, patience, kindness, gentleness, goodness, joy, peace, faithfulness, self-control, and ultimately love for our followers.

Prime-Mover Maintenance

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring (ultimate cause) of (your) life. Prv. 4:23

Inside most "small boys" (CG/DDG/FFG surface combatants) are gas turbine engines. Deep inside the recesses of the hull, near the keel, in hot engine rooms lie up to seven of these modified aircraft engines. They are the prime movers that make the propellers push the ship through the water and generate all of the required power for the vessel. They are the heart and soul of the ship - without them the ship is but a piece of dormant floating metal - a lifeless barge. Everyday each engine is provided rest and thoroughly washed with fresh water and a specifically designed cleaning solution. They are complex and delicate machines that must be treated with extreme care and constantly maintained if the ship is going to be able to conduct the mission it is designed for.

The heart is the gas turbine engine of the person. It is complex, delicate, and susceptible to wear and the perpetual build-up of dirt and grime (sin) as it is used throughout the day (Jer. 17:9). Daily the heart should be brought down for maintenance and cleansed in the specifically designed cleaning Solution of the Gospel. Daily, let us examine our hearts in light of the Word and confess the sin that stems from it that we may be completely washed, restored as an entirely new thing, improved for the task that the Lord has for us.

This verse is like a bar of soap for the Christian. "If we confess out sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us of all unrighteousness." (1st Jn. 1: 9)

Generous in love - God, give grace!
Huge in mercy - wipe out my bad record.
Scrub away my guilt,
soak out my sins in your laundry.
I know how bad I've been;
my sins are staring me down.
(Ps. 51:1-3 Message Translation)

Over All Lines!

Our supreme need, our only need, is to know God, the living God, and the power of his might. We need nothing else. It is just that, the power of the living God, to know that the living God is among us and that nothing else matters. . . . I say, forget everything else. Forget everything else. We need to realize the presence of the living God amongst us. Let everything else be silent. This is no time for minor differences. We all need to know the touch of the power of the living God. ~D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones

It is interesting to consider the freeing effect when the sins that enchained are broken and the unencumbered self begins to emerge. It's like the ship, doing what a ship is meant to do - which is to say go to sea, as the mooring lines are cast off. Jesus taught, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed" (Jn. 8:31-32, 34-36) The knowledge of the saving truth, only revealed by the accompanying Holy Spirit, is able to equip one for obedient following of the Lord’s teachings. There is freedom, distinct from salvation freedom, as we progress in the sanctification (Phil. 1:6) and further realization of who we are in Christ and what we have been designed for (i.e. glorify God and enjoy Him forever). Sin seeks to shackle each individual (believers and non-believers alike) to prevent this realization and ultimately to kill the Creator-reflecting humanity in each person. We forget, and so Christ reminds us that we are free indeed and the Spirit that raised Him from the dead has released us from the chains that bind and delivered us unto a transcendent life for His glory and our good. As change occurs it is not personality that is being transformed - for the Christian - but, Jesus emerging through us as His character is revealed. We diminish, He develops.

Standby . . .

But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!" Mt. 14: 22-36

Then he climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down. Mk. 6:51

A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Mk. 4: 35, 41

He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them. Mk. 6:48

Riding ships in stormy seas is an amazing experience that form the inner soul of the true Sailor. Unique to our profession is working with crashing waves around us - sea spray dousing you and the crew as you make preparations for entering port or an underway replenishment. It is a strange kind of fun as water smashes up and over your bow and the ship heaves as it yaws, pitches and rolls. Storms at sea put you directly in touch with the true magnificence of the Creator. God does some of his most spectacular work with raging black saltwater.

Stand by for heavy rolls while the ship comes about . . . in the coming days I am going to be writing about some heavy things. I write this blog mostly for my self - to work out my thoughts - and for others to read them and stir within their minds their own thoughts on the subject being presented. These days my thoughts are on repentance and my sin, redemption and my Savior. I have to understand how these things hinder and help, ruin and reform, and truly, practically influence the way I lead rather in the engine room, combat, or the bridge. I am convinced that if I am going to be serious about how I lead I have to be serious about how I sin. So, let's talk about the raging black saltwater within us - for God does, indeed, do some of His most spectacular work in the midst of it. To this end, I am going to be writing about sin and the ways of a Repentant Leader. If that word scares you or you think it may be discouraging - you would be partially right. You may not want to read for a time. But, you will miss out on the creation of a fuller understanding of the Gospel and its ability to completely transform you. So, I am going to be writing a series about things more sober, yet powerful. I've explored enough nuggets of leadership principles for now - something more is necessary. I think it may be time to think more seriously on more serious things. So, I'll consider the implications of the verses above and the Gospel-metaphor of the storm and the boat. Leadership begins with the leader - self-reflection is necessary for leadership development. I hope you will keep reading. If these daily doses of Biblical leadership thought stir your spiritual-mind then I would encourage you to tell 2-3 fellow leaders about it (simply text, IM, e-mail, Facebook the web address).